With an outstanding display of mediocrity, flirting on the borders of total ineptitude Team Paolini managed to outlast the feeble attempts of Team Senior and Team Seifert to capture first place honors of the Tritons Friday Nite Bowling at the Sandcastle Lanes in beautiful downtown White Rock.
Before a standing room audience made up of the entire Triton’s coaching staff(3) and one parent, the others waited in the parking lot so as not to be identified, the three teams attempted to use their impressive athletic ability waisting more than 3 hours before declaring a clear winner. Fighting off insults and "other" juevenille distractions Paolini’s squad somehow managed to stay focused long enough to escape with the win, thus avoiding the 2nd place prize of "Barbie back-paks". These will be worn proudly by Team Senior, who somehow found a way to mount a tremendous assault on the front runners. Led by the outstanding efforts of Mike Chow, he somehow carried his team until they found their stroke in time to keep the their balls in the lane long enough to score. 
Team Captain Nick Senior also turned in an outstanding performance in a display of true athleticism as a result of a previous injury , scoring more pins with his off hand than many did with their natural delivery. Unfortunately his team mates failed to follow his lead until it was too late. Other strong performances were turned in by Milan "2LATE" Mantle who over took from "ALL SHOW" Chow as the go to guy down the stretch. Derek Stebbe aka "White Goodman" hampered by a unknown Dodge Ball injury gutted out a sub performance to add little to the hollow victory. Dave Hadlow, Charley Clark Dayton Frost and Jake Chapman also finished strong after threatening to give the pin setter the rest of the night off in their earlier games.
Finally, we wish to acknowledge the efforts of Team Seifert with their display of brilliant sportsmanship and the exhibition of bowling skills (lack there of) they put on Friday night. Trash talking and their continuous lack of regard of any shred of decorum led by their Captain, was the tactic they choose.This was obviously an attempt to hide their lack of bowling skills. As a result they somehow manged to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Allowing themselves to be be beat in the final frames in what could only be categorized as a spine tingling loss. For their performance they were rewarded with the third place prize. One that befits their level of play when compared to the others on the evening.
Team Seifert will be easily recognized at the next team event. (This image was blurred to protect their identity.) In case they are not recognizable "Team Loosers" is made up of the following:
Burke "captain prairie boy" Seifert
Liam "flipper boy" Dolphin
Keenan "spare boy" Chanin
Sam ‘the man" Anderson
Josh "pooh boy" Remund
Sheldon "whalley boy" Leckobit
Paul "gutter boy" Schellenburg
All will be seen wearing the latest woman’s fashions and juvenile accessories. Dresses or skirts will have to be worn, along with the latest in fashionable back-pacs. No full length dresses please and all selections must be above the knee, the shorter the better. Stillettos and pumps are optional. Also please ensure you shave your legs. I suggest you ask your mom if you can borrow her shaver, not your dad as to avoid those unsightly nicks (no pun intended Senior).
Special thanks to the staff of the Sandcastle Lanes and sincerest apologies for any damage that may have resulted from the continuous pounding some of the lanes were subjected to and the amount of misuse all the lane gutters experienced during the course of the evening.
A great night of fun and laughs that was enjoyed by all who attended.
